Always find yourself stuck with anything to say, or do you find others taking over your conversations? Here we dive into the best conversation topics to keep the verbal juices flowing in any situation.
Daniel MacDougall
Here are four simple topics so you never run out of things to say. This article delves into the FORD method to spark engaging conversations.
I spent many years observing other people engage in captivating conversations. I often sat on the periphery of conversation circles, pondering what they were talking about. How can someone be a natural in the art of conversation, and how do we break those long stretches of silence?
People made meaningful connections with others and networked seamlessly through life. While I sat in rapture with nothing to say, and the conversation game was one I could not play, an intrigued observer with little to contribute. This also lead to a lack of confidence in verbal ability.
It's not that people like me live boring lives. It takes a little more effort to get those conversation juices flowing, so here are four simple topics to smash through the conversation ice using the FORD acronym: Family, Occupation, Recreation, and Dreams.
Family: A Cornerstone of Connection
Family topics universally resonate with everyone, whether it's good or bad, but one thing we all have in common. Family is our origin story, and the roots stretch far and wide. Research indicates that discussing family matters with strangers leads to closer connections post-conversation and can make one more memorable.
While approaching a stranger and asking about their family can be a little intrusive, it's best to begin with a light-hearted anecdote and then stack in deeper conversation layers. For instance, comment on your surroundings in a relatable way to your family. Restaurants, parks, bars, and outdoor events are great places to find plenty of informational topics.
At a restaurant, look through the menu. If there's pizza or pasta, comment on how your father would take over the kitchen every Friday for pizza/pasta night. Ask if their family developed any weekly food rituals.
Use your surroundings and relate them to your family. Once the other person opens up, ask further questions about siblings and parents. If they only have one brother, you could ask if they have ever considered what their home would be like if they had five brothers, etc.
This approach humanizes the conversation and paves the way for a mutual exchange of personal narratives. Talking about where you come from adds layers of trust for future conversation topics.
Occupation: Going Beyond Surface-level Interactions
Asking what someone does for a living is basic social interaction, yet it often leads to broader discussion topics with the right approach.
The standard "What do you do for a living?" often traps conversations on a superficial level. This can lead to what some call interview-style conversations, thus letting the conversation take the course of quick answer Q&A. It's tiring for the other person, but the standard opening question is a starting point. Just do not let the conversation take on the interview approach.
Instead, once you learn someone's occupation, ask about the fulfilling nature of their work.
It doesn't matter what job they do. It can be in construction, Waitress, Janitor, Assistant, and anything else, but consider the struggles they have to deal with day-to-day. Anyone working in the service industry has crazy stories. Teachers have the fulfilling aspect of passing on knowledge. Baristas often make the strangest drinks while dealing with comical customers.
Refrain from asking if they like their job. More times than not, people don't, or they will lie and say they do to move the conversation. Instead, focus on fulfillment and responsibility in their work endeavors. People are far more receptive to indulging in the weight they carry on their shoulders or discussing the nuances of their profession. If you're struggling for a place to start, ask questions with open answers.
"What's your biggest challenge?"
"What is the most fulfilling aspect of your career?"
"What is the funniest part of your job?"
"Do you guys ever have staff parties?"
Recreation: Uncovering People's Interests
Inquiries into hobbies or sports activities serve as a gateway to discuss individual interests and preferences. Initiate with basic inquiries about what they like to do in their spare time and follow up with thoughtful commentary to demonstrate active listening. Always keep in mind as to why this activity is so interesting for this person.
This strategy reveals a personal side to their narrative and invites them to elaborate on what brings meaning.
People are far more receptive to converse about their passions.
It is also a great way to learn something more about yourself. It could be something you have never tried before, or if it is, you both have something in common. There are also plenty of follow-up topics. How did you get into this, or do you do this with friends? Recreational topics can veer into many different categories and let you focus on what is important to them. It also allows delving into activities of your own. Feel free even to include and discuss activities you would like to try.
Dreams: Aspirations and Support
Discussing someone's dreams and aspirations is to touch on their inner core. Everyone has dreams they are undertaking or wishing to achieve, and it's one of the most powerful topics. Although it's a great topic, don't let this topic be your first conversation piece. Play around with the other topics first and let the conversation open up.
Sometimes, people don't even know what they desire until they begin talking about it, and if you are the person they share these desires with, all the better.
Exploring conversations about dreams, especially with genuine interest and support, can significantly impact their perception of you. This will foster a sense of connection and mutual respect. Feel free to share your dreams, even if you feel a little silly sharing them. It will show a sense of humility, letting their guard down.
Ask about the challenges they face or what is holding them back. There is plenty to talk about, and you might be able to offer your insight.
If you are looking for a verbal place to start, begin with an opening statement.
"There are so many things to do out there. Do you ever wish you were doing something else?"
"What would you do if you had all the spare time in the world?"
Look for conversational grounds if you ask about their recreational activities or occupations. People leave dialog tidbits all over the place, and there is meaning in the subtle statements they make.
If you're struggling for things to say, remember: Family, occupation, recreation, and dreams. This method serves as a comprehensive guide to engaging in rich conversations that foster deeper connections. By exploring these topics with curiosity, empathy, and genuine interest, individuals can navigate social interactions and set themselves up for future conversations. This method can be practiced anywhere, but remember one thing, the best conversationalist is the best listener.
Weekly Side Quest:
Next time you find yourself at a loss for words try the FORD method and see how you do. Play around with the different topics to discuss and see what hits, but keep the mindset of active listening. Listen to what people have to say.
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Author's note: none of the writing was generated or made by AI. Our mission is provide a human touch to our journeys together. Thankyou always, Daniel MacDougall…